Gardening with the Cat, the Snapping Turtle and the Snake

My husband, Mark, wrote this in a letter to my mother.  

While we were gardening in the backyard, we were joined by all three pets. Garfield, our tabby cat, was perched on the landscape timbers at the other end of the yard. He was watching his favorite dirt spot being converted into a usable tomato patch. Cats hate change, and I could see this was another unapproved change.

Tank, the snapping turtle, was sun tanning next to his swimming pool. Having consumed a cod filet last night, he was speeding along his digestive tract. Turtles are cold blooded and need the heat to digest their meals. Unlike his wild counterparts, he is calm around my presence, and has been transported from his indoor tub to the outdoor pool thousands of time. He doesn’t mind the transportation process. And when he wants to eat, he comes to the surface, making eye contact. Then we retrieve the trout, cod, or tilapia, cutting it into small pieces, and float the pieces down to his mouth. When the fish approach his mouth, he makes a snapping motion, pulling the morsel into his maw.

And thirdly, Shredder, the 55” bullsnake was sunbathing beneath a Dorfman Pacific Outback Hat. He would poke out his amber speckled head, and allow the heat to radiate down his length. After an hour and a half of hide and seek, where he was mostly hiding, he decided to seek out other terrain. He crossed the front yard, poking his nose in the grass, looking for a rodent hole. Finding none, he was a bit perplexed. Where there’s grass, there are always rodent holes. It's instinctual. Then he was relocated to the backyard where he slithered the length of the landscaping timbers. He was one happy snake. By the way, Jeanie named him Shredder. His hidey hole box had the word  “Shredder” labeled on it. It had been labeled for the shredding of bank and investment documents.

Preview of June Blog

June's blog will be about my husband and I driving half way across the country to look for salamanders in the Smoky Mountains and Georgia.  By the fifth day, I needed to go to the mall for some retail therapy and some pampering at the hair salon.  After I had told a sympathetic hair stylist about my trip, she said, "Honey, you just needed to vent!"

My husband wrote a 14-page synopsis of the trip.  “Salamander” is the most prevalent word, including the form “salamandering” (looking for salamanders).   “Newt” is used 18 times, and “eft” is used 9 times.

This is one of the sentences containing “salamandering”:

“May 6^th, 2011 Friday

This begins one of Jeanie’s favorite days since it did not involve morning salamandering.”  

Honeymoon with a Herpetologist

The following article has been accepted for publication by "Reptiles" magazine.  It will be in the September 2011 issue.

My first clue should have been when I saw snake tongs on the honeymoon packing list.  The second clue should have been when my fiancé Mark started reading about the reptiles and amphibians of the Yucatan peninsula.  

When we were at the travel agency, Mark asked the agent which resorts had the most snakes and other reptiles on their property.   When she replied that the resorts tried to control the snake population, Mark explained that he planned his vacations around seeing different species of snakes and amphibians.  The agent gave me a sympathetic look.

The agent showed us brochures of various resorts with beautiful beaches and swimming pools.  This was my idea of an ideal honeymoon, but Mark didn’t look too excited.  When she showed us a picture of the Xcaret resort, Mark perked up.  Sea turtles, iguanas, and other reptiles?  This was what a honeymoon was all about! 

The photos from our honeymoon have a very high reptile ratio.  The rough order of the photos are  iguana, gecko, iguana, me, gecko, sea turtle, Mayan ruins, gecko, me standing behind large iguana, etc.  There are no pictures to indicate that Mark and I were actually together on the honeymoon.  We realized this after we posted our photos.

Mark responded, “There were plenty of pictures of us from our wedding, but when can you see so many iguanas?”

Mark brought a large flashlight on the honeymoon.   The flashlight was for illuminating the various reptiles and amphibians that Mark hoped to see on his nightly walks.  The first day at the resort was rainy, so Mark wanted to go out with his large flashlight and his camera.  Even though I was exhausted, I imagined him being arrested for suspicious activity and being held in a Mexican prison.   I sleepily followed him on his journey through the resort.   We saw a tiny snake about the size of a worm under a leaf.  He was disappointed, but I enjoyed seeing the raccoon-like coatimundis.

The next day, we were walking around the resort when Mark saw some workers cutting the undergrowth with machetes.  Neither he nor I knew Spanish very well, but he was determined to find a snail eater snake.   I only knew the French word “escargot”, which was not the same in Spanish.  Mark pantomimed eating a snail, and the workers thought he wanted to find some snails to eat.   As we walked away, I saw them shaking their heads and laughing at the crazy Americans. 

We were both impressed with the ancient Mayan ruins of Tulum.  Mark was also impressed by the size of an iguana sitting on a rock.  This iguana appears frequently in our honeymoon photo collection. 

At the Xcaret resort, we saw baby sea turtles of various sizes.  We were fascinated by the way that they swam with their flippers behind their backs. 

Even  though our honeymoon was different than I had imagined in many ways, I would not have traded one minute of my honeymoon with a herpetologist.